Obstacles...

So it's finally happening. I am craving my normal bad foods! I don't know if it was the fact I was at my fav. mexican resteraunt the other day that sparked it, or the fact I'm an idiot who sat and watch and entire show about fried foods! Ugh! I mean in a way, I know that I HAVE to lose this weight and be healthy....but in another way, I keep saying to myself 'whats the point?' I want to be healthy, and I know I am for the most part, but I am just tired of being fat. On the same note, I don't want to live my life forever wanting something that is 'forbidden' or 'off limits' to me. What a paradox...Isn't it sad that when you have an eating disorder EVERYTHING revolves around food? *sigh*

I'm also having huge money issues as of lately. It seems that there is never enough and things just keep piling up. I'm at a loss on what to do. I have a full-time job, but I don't want to be there half the time to make the money I need to. I know that sounds stupid because most people don't wanna be at work, but at my job we HAVE to option to leave early if we want too...kinda sucks to have that temptation..

Overall, I have done well lately. I am going to invest in a scale tomorrow to see what my results have been so far. I'm both nervous and excited. I'm more nervous because I feel that if I haven't reached a certain number by now, I will just give up and give in. I can't do that really, but I know myself....

On a side note...THIS made my day!!

I'll let you all know how the weigh in goes!! Cross those fingers!!